Me at about the time of looking at my bank accounts.
I did my taxes yesterday.
I know, I know, hold your applause.
It really beat the shit out of me, though, and not only because the new way business deductions are handled for 1099-MISC work is confusing as heck. (I just assumed none of my salary was deductible, because no one ever gets mad at you for not taking a deduction.) Taxes just fry my brain every year because everyone almost makes sense, but not quite.
The real sucker punch, though, was checking my bank accounts when I needed the account number for my refund. I was already pretty frazzled, and then I saw my balances, which were much lower than I thought they were.
*gulp*
I’ll be fine, but it just threw me for a loop and my brain subconsciously decided it had had enough for the day. I subbed my taxes, and tried to think of something fun to do. I couldn’t, so I played Metal Gear Solid V until I got frustrated and quit. I couldn’t think of anything fun to do then, either. I flopped on my bed, texted a little, and essentially blue-screened from around 6pm until I woke up (for more than taking my meds) at 5am. (I beat my alarm, it was terrible.)
I feel like I’ve been doing something similar a lot lately. My depression-anxiety brain gets ahold of me and I just…shut down, unless I have an obligation I have to attend to pre-scheduled. I’m hoping I can find a way to knock it off, at least a bit. But for now, it’s a struggle, and I’m sharing it. So hah. 😛
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